A scream builds and churns inside of me.
It shifts and pushes against my chest.
Tearing at my heart like a rabid beast.
I will it to come but all that seems to stem from my pain are these tears.
The salt burning my eyes and impairing my vision.
I can see no future.
Only these tears.
The anxiety of nothing,
creating a constant strain on the mind.
The pressure to do, say, or think more.
We must behave in the right way,
See only that which isn’t there.
But every time there is only nothing.
It is so funny to wake up and know that there are people in the world who hate me before knowing me.
To read and to hear these words of anger and ignorance. Judging me; sentencing me to death before hearing the truth.
But you don’t want to hear. You don’t want to know that I am a person free and whole. With fears, choices, and a life only seen through my eyes.
I have only my heart to guide me and my feet to follow as I become the person I am meant to be. There is no guide book, there is no singular path. I must make my own way. Fighting for my life at every turn. Facing my own demons, it is up to me to rise above. To find my own song, dance my own dance, and write my own story.
So who are you to tell me I can’t?
Keep talking your hate for I can no longer hear it.
I am free!
I could breathe this space for a lifetime. Absorbing the cool sweet atmosphere that covers me like a warm blanket. the sensation of your heart reaching out to me. I am forever alive in your eyes and as I drift away into a deep slumber it is you which anchors me. Keeping me safe. Keeping me still. Forever nurturing my dreams and setting fire to my passion. With one touch I am yours, with one kiss I am solid, able to drift above myself seeing the whole truth of it. It is one life one heart and our spirits which blending together make the sweetest sound of all, silence.
Along with my love of writing fiction I also enjoy writing poetry and have done so for quite a long time. So I feel it would be a good way to get to know me and my writing style by posting some of my poetry here on my blog! Feel free to give me feedback and I hope you like it 🙂
This Is Me Asking For Help
Engulfed by fear of the shadows and dark corners in my mind.
All I want to do is run, run and hide,
never having to see the shadows for what they truly are.
But I try to stand tall, even when I’m shaking
and then I finally realize just how vulnerable I am.
I have exposed all my weaknesses
and now have no way of covering them.
Can I defend myself?
Should I defend myself?
I just want to find one moment to rest
or one hand to hold.
Would that be too much to ask?
Is that the sad truth?
That we must face these shadows alone.
I do not want to be alone, not now nor ever.
I keep reaching out for that one hand
that will hold fast to mine and never let go.
Sometimes I feel finger tips.